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Saying is believing

Writer's picture: Peter TeuscherPeter Teuscher


Have you ever heard someone say something and then asked them to explain what they meant only to have them say something like, “well you know what I mean”?  Sometimes people are just repeating something they have heard, but don’t really understand themselves, and thus don’t know if they even know what it means. We hear things, repeat them to others and if we get the reaction we want, we will repeat the same things to other people. Many people simply repeat what they hear rather than considering or reflecting carefully on what they are saying. If we allow it, this is what contributes to the conditioning of our beliefs. This is important because what we believe has a huge effect on our lives.


When I learn something new I try to teach it to someone else because this helps solidify it in my own mind. But when we tell other people things we aren’t really sure about we start to anchor those things in our minds whether we believe them or not. Neuro-Linguistic Programming or NLP is a technique that some coaches use with clients. NLP looks at the connection between our language and the programs or thinking habits that create patterns in our mind. By looking at the language a person uses it becomes easier to determine some of their mental roadblocks.


When coaching clients start telling me about themselves or describing their situation the language they use reveals a lot about their beliefs. It is when I question the statements they make that they become aware of some of the beliefs that don’t really support them. This is why I encourage people to be more aware of the language that they use. For example, when people talk about things in negative absolutes like always or never? If you tell yourself that things always go wrong or never work out for you, you are convincing yourself and your unconscious mind that this is the case. Any self-talk that you use to berate yourself only works to confirm this reality to your unconscious mind.


I urge people to be mindful of what they say and especially the language that they use. Our unconscious mind listens and hears the words we use and the statements we make. It is like making a wish to the genie in the bottle. When you make statements to your unconscious it will not questions you but will react like the genie: your wish is my command. When you get clear on what you want and talk about it in a positive way it will help develop more support beliefs. This will reduce the resistance toward actions that could lead to greater success and happiness. Anything that you want to have or achieve in life you first need to convince yourself that it is possible. The clues as to how ready and confident you really are can be reflected in the language that you use. So be aware of the language you use because it just might be contributing to beliefs that are standing in your way.


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