There is a stereotype that men won’t ask for directions and won’t admit when they are lost. This may apply to some men in terms of travelling to a destination but it can apply to anyone on the journey of life. I have seen many people very determined to reach a destination in life while at the same time being very unclear on what they are actually trying to achieve They live their life and don’t realise they going through the motions as if they were in a hamster wheel, all the while insisting they know where they are going and what they want. Too many people go through life checking boxes on a list they have not made and use this as their road map to life.
The first step is to admit you are lost. You can feel lost in your relationship, your job or in life in general. Any time you feel like you are turning in circles, just getting by or in a rut, you may have lost your way. Getting by doesn’t just refer to money. You can be getting by without love in your life or without the friendships and meaningful relationships you need. You may be so focused on giving to others you have lost sight of what makes you happy. Or you have been so busy building a career that you have lost sight of your values; what is really important to you. It’s ok to admit that you are lost. It takes a great deal of awareness-
When you realise you are lost what do you do? Ask for directions. You can take the time to reflect and look for some answers and directions from within. Admitting you are lost can be very liberating and will allow you to reflect and see or sense things that you have not been noticing. This requires taking time for yourself and getting out of your routines so if you don’t have time for this get yourself a coach. A coach can’t give you the answers or tell you which direction you should go, nor should they. The coaching process will help you reflect in a way that can be difficult to do on your own. Even as a coach, I still go to others to get coaching usually once a year just to help me see things from a new perspective.
Finally, the destination that many people are unconsciously looking for is happiness. Everyone knows happiness is not a destination and yet so many people live life in an if-then mindset. If this happens then I will be happy or when this happens then I will be happy, successful, satisfied, etc. If you recognise this in yourself then take time today to do something that brings you joy. Take time out to spend time with a friend and do something fun. Happiness is in the moment so if you have lost your way to happiness remember it’s not at the end of a rainbow. Opportunities for happiness are all around you and the roadmap for how to find it is within you.
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